Blog 13

So the festivities of Xmas day are over thank god and once again I sit here feeling groggy with a demanding 5 year old who won’t take no for an answer. By saying no to her she cries and sulks and goes immediately upstairs to see my wife who’s still in bed and then all hell brakes loose! I really wouldn’t mess with me on this medication! I will properly let rip at anyone who raises their voice at me or even looks at me the wrong way! Just leave me alone to wake from this groggy state! ‘Why didn’t you do what she wanted’ came the question from my wife as my daughter woke her up because she couldn’t get her own way with me ‘because I was in the kitchen washing up and she was rude’ came my reply. ‘Just do what she wants will you’ wifey said, who’s now in a foul mood as she’s been woken up! ‘oh what, so you can lay in bed and have a quiet life. Sorry if she bothered you you selfish cow but now you know what it’s like to get up with her every morning just as I’ve done for fucking years. It’s only coz this fucking medication knocks me out you have to get up with her for the first time in fucking years. You are so selfish, just like your old man you are. Typical bloody selfish Aggies’ came my response. Its true, for some reason our daughter Lucy needs waking up for school monday-Friday but come Saturday and Sunday she’s up at bloody 7am! Now as I’ve previously mentioned I used to be regular as clockwork. Bed at 11ish awake aroubd 7:30ish. It’s only since my bipolar diagnosis and medication that my sleep pattern is out of sync. My wife has always been the same. Never mess with her in the mornings, never touch the tv when her shitty soap operas are on and never mess with her when she’s hungry! It’s like the rules for gizmo from the film gremlins!

Anyway now there is silence which is perfect for me as I seem to be coming around slowly from my haze. So back to yesterday. I couldn’t believe it. I actually went back to the inlaws after coming home to feed and walk the dog! Now this is completely out of character for me as I usually jump at the chance of leaving that house on Xmas day but for some reason when I got home I felt alone and a bit uncomfortable? I would usually relish the peace and quiet but not his time. All I wanted to do was be with my family again, yes even the outlaws! Maybe I did enjoy the day more than I thought after all? Anyway, so I put my hat, scarf and gloves on again. I got my bike back out of the garage and cycled the mile or so back to the outlaws. It’s was bloody freezing. All the cars had frost on them! Even though she said she didn’t care I know my wife was shocked that I returned. So was I love, don’t you worry about that! So we left around 8pm. Kate, kids and more presents in the car and me on my bike! I was determined to beat them home so I went like the clappers and we both got home at the same time!

I took my la la pills as I call them and right on schedule around half an hour later I was ready for bed. In bed by 11pm. So now it’s 9:45am. Time for breakfast. Shower and a shave. Ready to set off for London at 11am to see my family! Until tomorrow. Happy Boxing Day everyone….

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